More questions answered...

So back to the questions or comments I would like to give our answers to:

You did such a wonderful by adopting, these children will have such a great life with you.
We adopted because we wanted children. We had a strong desire to be parents and have a family. We did not adopt to do something amazing or to get a reaction like this, we adopted because we wanted children. We pray that we can give them a good home and a good life, but we are not great people or people who did this amazing thing by rescuing our children. We know for a fact that our children would have been loved by thier birth parents, we only hope we can give them more opportunities in life and will raise them in a Christian home, our prayer is that they thrive in our home and we are great parents but we did not rescue our children from a doomed life.

How much did you pay for them?
This is not an appropriate question. It is ok to ask, are your children adopted? I do not classify my children as "my adopted daughter" they are simply our children and they are 100% our's. We do not know what it is like to have biological children, but we could not love our children more, therefore I know we wouldn't feel any differently about them if they were biological or adopted. And we did not purchase our children, we paid for the cost involved in adoption. As an adoption social worker I can now see where that money goes to. The agency has to pay a lot of costs just to place one child and for every child placed there are others who choose parenting.

Where did they come from?
Well God I guess. The real question should be, where were they born? And when we say North Carolina- don't act like that is so surprising that they were not born in another country. There are black people in the U.S.!! :)

What was thier real mother/ father like?
Well then you are asking what we are like, because we are their "real" mother and father. You can ask about their birth parents, but we also call their birth mother's by their names, because birth parent is kind of impersonal for the woman who chose life and chose to place their child with us and give us the greatest gifts imaginable!

Why did your adoption processes go so quickly compared to other agencies?
Well because New Horizons is simply the best :) :) Since we were open to any race, New Horizons places a large number of African American or African American bi-racial children through partner agencies therefor the process is typically very fast for families open to African American children.

Why did you choose New Horizons?
Well again- they are the best :) We researched other agencies and decided that New Horizons was the best agency for us to use. They are very faith based, a smaller agency, cheaper than other christian agencies, and have a shorter waiting time for all children placed. SO- here is my adoption advice to adoptive parents- RESEARCH different agencies and decide which one is best for what you are seeking to adopt- don't just go with the one more known in the area- you owe it to yourselves to find the agency that can best serve you and get you the child God has chosen for you.

What do you do for New Horizons?
I am an adoption specialist/ social worker. I work with birth mothers and help them make an informed decision for their child and themselves whether what is best for their child is parenting or adoption. I also do home studies for couples who are adopting. I LOVE my job! Birth parent counseling is very hard and emotionally draining - but SOOOO rewarding. I love working with adoptive parents too because I can definately relate to them, which helps so much to have someone who understands and has been there.

How do you do African American hair?
Well Aniah's hair is much different than our hair. Her hair is all in tight spiral curls. When you pull a curl out, her hair is very long, but it looks shorter because it is so tight. Her hair is much coarser than ours as well and much dryer. So- I found some good hair products to help me manage it!! They are from www.carolsdaughter.com They are all natural and work great. They help her hair become softer and so I am able to comb it out, which is still quite the task. Her hair gets very tangly in just one day. Now- everyone has said- you can't wash their hair as much because it dries it out. Well I have tested this philosophy and have found it not to be true. I wash it about every other day and then I am able to comb it out, else it gets very tangly and Aniah screams when I try to comb it or do it. We usually just put it in pony tails but have had it braided twice. Aniah did fantastic during braiding it, which really surprised me, but I think she did better with someone else doing it. So we will continue to learn how to manage it. Her hair didn't get the way it is now until she was 18 months old. Eden's hair is exactly like Aniah's was, soft, black, and curly, but I'm hoping for more of the white genes in her hair, but we shall wait and see.

Ok- I need to get going and save some for later! Last night we got together with my friends from high school for a happy occasion instead of a sad one, as the last three occasions have been funerals. We had a great time and it's amazing how we still get along so well and have so much fun together for not seeing each other very often. I am preparing for Eden's baptism this weekend and having many people over to our house. So we will post some pictures of our beautiful Eden in her baptism dress.
Love you all! -Heidi